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December 31, 2014

New Year’s Eve gets me every time. Despite knowing perfectly well how a calendar works, that this is the last – THE LAST DAY! – of 2014 quietly blows my mind. One last day and that’s it – Another year over and done with.

Naturally, this is a time that prompts a lot of reflection and navel-gazing and this blogpost is no exception. 2014 has been such a long and wide and deep year. For me, it is a year overflowing in experience:

January, I was feeling very frusticipated about all the things that would happen in 2014 that hadn’t happened after one week into the New Year.

Then in February, I swung the other way and very slightly emotional that the chapter of my life that was medical school was entering its final paragraphs (But there was still plenty left to write, wasn’t there?). 2014 was the year that I poured out my emotions via the medium of Doctor Who gifs.

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Then the kid gloves came off and 2014 came out swinging. March saw me adrift on the squally seas of outrageous fortune as the Foundation Programme cast me wherever it damn well wanted. In the end, I’ve come ashore in remarkably pleasant conditions – A district general hospital, St Elsewhere’s, somewhere around London, and my friends and fiancee are still on hand. Who would’ve thought!

But then there was April and 2014 had me on the ropes. I failed my final exams and would have to resit them if I had any hope of getting out alive. That time was dark and difficult for me. I had to fight against legion demons of guilt, recrimination and worthlessness – And this was all while Eve was half the world away in Canada! T.S. Eliot was right – April is the cruellest month. That said, my internship at the BMJ, the Clegg Scholarship, was incredible and I’m still reaping the benefits from the time spent in Tavistock Sqaure.

Finally, in June, I turned turmoil into triumph – I passed my resits and graduated medical school! I could not have done it alone – I was picked back up by the medical school, by my friends, Eve, and by Twitter, a thousand lovely friends – but neither could I have done it if I hadn’t found something inside too stubborn to give up.

As much as I love Eve, she confuses the hell out of me. What she saw in me in the first instance, and what she continues to see in me that inspire what I presume to be love. Curious creature. Another enigma was added to this riddle in July when I asked her to marry me – she said yes! (I will never understand this woman, I swear).

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And from August onwards, I’ve been busy at St Elsewhere’s. I’m enjoying my first year as a junior doctor. The hours are long, and sometimes the job is really, really, really stressful but six months in and I’m still going strong.

Like I said, 2014 has been a year overflowing with experience. I’ve grown and been forced to grow – I’ve earned my EXP points and my stats are buffed. I hope I’ll have as much to talk about in 2015.

But while there’s a little of 2014 left, I’ll leave you with my favourite gif from this year.

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